“I’m not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.” – Stephen Covey
So many people who have problems to solve want to lay the blame for these problems on someone else, or something outside of themselves. Although comforting in some ways, it is a poor way to lead one’s life. It’s so easy to blame parents, your boss, a loved one, or the weather. The difficult road is to face yourself in the mirror and realize that you are the product of every decision you have made.
Honesty is the beginning of improvement. When we are honest with ourselves and truly take ownership of our situation in life, only then can we begin to take the actions that will lead us to a better tomorrow. Are you unhappy with your health or appearance, are you unhappy with the amount of money you make, are you unhappy with some of your relationships, are you unhappy?
Happiness starts within. It’s that simple. You choose to be happy or to be miserable. This is the first step. You have to be happy with yourself and not look for happiness elsewhere. If you are looking for something out there, you’ll always be looking. The same goes for only being happy when the circumstances are right, or some event occurs. Take a look at the people who are always influenced by outside circumstances. If everything is right they are happy, if something happens outside of themselves they are not happy with they are not happy. Can you visualize the roller coaster these people ride?
Once you realize that happiness is an attitude a way of thinking every day you’ve taken a huge step. Next, we have to look for the things we want to improve. Is it your appearance? If so, what about your appearance do you want to change? If it’s weight loss or lean muscle gain, do some research, figure out how you should eat, put together a plan, and begin working toward that goal.
If it’s money, think about what you need to do to make more of it. Is there a chance for promotion in your current firm or are you in a position that does not avail you of a promotion opportunity? If you can’t get promoted, then it’s time to look for a new position. Look around the Internet for job advertisements, improve your skill set, put together a plan and execute.
The key to self-improvement is determining where you are right now, then determine where you would like to be. Once you know these two things you can begin formulating a plan that will help you attain what you want. Plan on mistakes, setbacks, and faults in your plan, particularly if you are attempting something you’ve never done before. This is all about the learning process.
Sometimes you don’t need to start from scratch. If you do a little research, you may find someone else that was in your position and learn how they got themselves out of it. Learn from them, instead of making the same mistakes they did. This will not only help you grow but will also help you formulate a better plan.
The next time you start feeling sorry for yourself, take a quick inventory. Are you letting outside circumstances control you? Are you blaming someone or something else for your current situation? If you are STOP! You cannot control other people. You cannot control the weather. You cannot control anything that is outside of yourself. You can only control how you interpret and react to circumstances. It is your attitude that dictates how you feel.
Be honest with yourself, find happiness within you, and change your circumstances to the ones you want. No one is responsible for where you are but you. I wish you well on your self-improvement journey.
Until next time…