Daily Ramblings – Spiritual Saturday – Giving

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family, Friends, Gifts, Giving, Good memories, Good times, Togetherness

As we give of ourselves, of our patience and love, to someone else who needs it more, something changes inside us. Something flows in, a flow of good feeling. A spiritual upliftment occurs both in us and in the person receiving the love.

—Harold Klemp
The Language of Soul

Have you ever thought about your favorite moments in life? I do from time-to time, and none of them involve money, an award, or anything else material. My best memories are with family.

I remember playing Scrabble with the family when I was a kid. I remember learning how to play card games. I remember my grandfather teaching how to play chess. The best memories I have are those where I spent time with someone else.

When we give of ourselves, we open ourselves up. It is an expanding practice. It makes us feel good and the person receiving the gift to feel good. Sometimes, just giving someone the time of day on the phone is enough. Maybe they’re having a rough time of it and need to vent. Maybe they just did something terrific and don’t have anyone else to tell. These little moments are the most precious to most people.

There is one circumstance when I was thrilled when I received something. It was when my late grandmother sent me a gift in the mail, while I was in the Army. What meant a lot to me is she never missed a birthday–ever. I also knew she didn’t make a lot of money from Social Security and other things, and it meant so much that she would still take the time to get me something. Toward the end of her life, she used to send homemade chocolate peanut butter cups. Sometimes they would show up all melted, but it was truly the thought that mattered.

My mother is the same way. She never, ever, misses a birthday. Even when I was deployed in the Middle East, she got me birthday and Christmas presents. Another time, my wife and I decided to put together a cheese and meat plate and sit behind our home next to the pool and listen to jazz. We didn’t say anything to one another. We just sat there, enjoyed the music, nibbled on cheese, meat, and crackers, and enjoyed our moment together in complete silence.

I hope each of you has a terrific Saturday!

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Spiritual Saturday – Friends

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Buddies, family, Friend, Friends, Friendship, Saturday, Spiritual

As I write this post, one of my Mother’s friends is visiting. It’s great to see her hang out with other women, because frankly, hanging out with two guys all the time (Dad and I) is boring. Guys don’t talk like women do, at least Dad and I don’t.

Friends are those folks who know us. They know who we are, how we tick. Friendship lasts a lifetime, or they fade when we move, and forget to stay in touch. Today, that seems impossible, but I imagine it happens, particularly when a friendship really wasn’t to begin with.

I don’t have many friends, but the ones I have are lifers. My best friend is my wife, but I also have a significant group of folks in AZ that I stay in touch with. Our society is very mobile today. I moved back home to help my folks. One friend moved to Boston, another to Las Vegas. Still another moved to AZ as I was leaving. Things change, people change, but friendship remains.

Friendship is the best, isn’t it?

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Thankful Thursday – Grateful for My Dad

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Dad, Dementia, family, Good life, Reading, Retirement, YouTube

Dad’s got Dementia. I returned home in January 2017 to come home to help out the folks. Since coming back home, I have seen first-hand how devastating this disease is. Dad loved TV for most of his life. He was born in 1939, so he was part of the first TV generation, growing up on radio initially. Within a year of my return, he forgot how to turn on the TV.

His short-term memory and attention span have also taken a hit. He can no longer follow long and complicated plots on TV or on streaming sources like Netflix. He is also not a huge fan of public TV because he hates all of the commercials. So, I got him on YouTube and he loves it. There is a lot of variety, most of the videos he watches are 5-10 minutes in length and they are entertaining to him.

Dad provided for the family for over 40 years. He made a good home for Mom, provided for three kids, and before he retired, was working 16-hour shifts to put together a big enough nest egg for he and Mom to retire on. Well done, Dad.

Dad is still an avid reader. He probably puts down 3-4 books a month. I don’t think he understands much of the stories, but it keeps him busy. Today, I’m grateful to my Dad, who now needs my help. It feels good to pay back the life my parents gave me and my siblings, by retiring early and refocusing my life on new things and them.

Today, I’m grateful for my Dad.

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Thankful Thursday – Grateful for my Nephew

Tags

Dad, family, Girl time, Grateful, Gratitude, Mom, Nephew, vacation

I picked up my nephew and his girlfriend from the airport today. Boy, are they a cute couple. My nephew will graduate this year from ASU. He’ll be heading to medical school or a Master’s program next. He’s on track to do great things.

His girlfriend was a real sweetheart, too. She was amazed at all the green in Michigan. She is a native Arizonian, and they are used to the desert, where everything is brown, save for the cactus and scrub brush. There are trees there too, but not to the extent we have them in Michigan.

It always tickles my Mom and Dad pink when they have visitors, especially my Mom. When no one is here, she has to put up with two guys (My Dad and I) and we are not talkative. I’m buried in my work and reading, while my Dad, who has dementia, has lost his ability to have a two-way conversation. So Mom is stuck without another woman to chat with. Sure, she has her Facebook friends that she video chats with from time-to-time, but it’s not the same as sitting down with another woman over a cup of coffee and just talking. So, I’m glad my nephew’s girlfriend is here. She and Mom hit it off great.

Well, that’s it for today, folks! Have a great Thursday!

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Spiritual Saturday – Focus on the Positive

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family, Friends, Good, Good weather, Grateful, pets, Positivity, Thankful

It is so easy to think about bad things. I think this is because our brains are wired to seek out danger. It’s a survival mechanism.

That being said, stressing out about things we do not control can really throw us into a tizzy. So, why not flip the coin and concentrate on the good things in life? Some of the things we take for granted are those same things we notice when they go away or stop working. Things like good health, a steady Internet connection, a computer that works, and a car that gets us from one place to another.

Think about the finite reality we call life? So little time, yet so much, if we use it wisely. Reading, writing, learning, loving, experiencing. Get everything you can out of life. Exploring new places, doing things you’ve never done, and loving like there is no tomorrow.

In Michigan, we have been experiencing a heat wave. In the last few hours we have finally gotten some rain. I can hear the pitter patter on the roof. It should cool things down a bit, and give the grass, flowers, and plants in my Mother’s garden some much-needed watering.

One of my daily practices is to be thankful for even the smallest things. It makes me feel great, and it gets my day started the right way. I express my thanks for God, my family, my friends, and many other things. If you haven’t tried this practice, start simply by writing down three things that bring you joy each day. If you want to really go for it, do this in the morning when you arise and right before you go to bed. It’s terrific!

Well, that’s all I have for now. I wish all of you a great Saturday!

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Spiritual Saturday – Happy 4th of July!!

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4th of July, Barbeque, Celebration, family, Fireworks, Fourth of July, Friends, Holiday, Independence Day

Today is the day we celebrate the independence day of the United States. It’s a day for fireworks, barbeque, and family. This year is a little different because everything is closed, but the feelings are the same. It’s a great day to celebrate America!

For those of you who live in the States, Happy 4th!

I hope each of you has a great day of good food, family and friends.

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Spread Your Wings Sunday – Week of May 31, 2020.

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Call them, Connect, family, Reach Out, Spread Your Wings, Sunday, Weekly Challenge

Week of May 31, 2020 challenge: Call a family member you haven’t talked with in a while and check in to make sure they are OK. Both COVID and the recent riots are probably putting a lot of folks in danger. Wish them well and ask them if they need anything.

In the comments, reply with whom you talked with and how it went.

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Spiritual Saturday – Let People Be Who They Are

Tags

family, Freedom, Friends, good will, Responsibility, Spiritual Saturday, warm love

Our freedom stops where someone else’s starts. This line is called responsibility.

—Harold Klemp
The Language of Soul

People irritate us. Let’s be honest. Your husband, wife, mother, father, brother, sister, or long-time friend. They all do things that bug the crap out of us. The part we forget: We do things that bug the crap out of them too. Love people for who they are.

Now love has a few different levels, so to speak. Your love for your close family and friends is emotional and nostalgic. The relationships are close because you have so many shared experiences. Those outside of this circle get our good will. Many use the word love, but it is more about good will or a lack of feeling altogether. Sure you feel bad for someone that has experienced loss or a traumatic situation, but you aren’t as effected as you would be if a close family member or friend experienced the same thing.

As human beings, we are naturally empathetic. When you read about a family in your area dying in a house fire, you would naturally feel bad for the family. If the same disaster happened to your immediate family, it would be devastating.

You can’t control other people. People will do what they will do. All of us have blind spots. We all have that thing we could improve on. We don’t need to rub this in someone else’s face. In most cases, they’ll resist the change you suggest that much more, or they may increase what they do to bug you even more.

Let your loved ones breathe. Let them pursue the life they want to. Love them for who they are. Love them for the things that bug you. Love them for their idiosyncrasies, their flaws, their eccentricities. These things make them unique. They are endearing if you look at them in this fresh light.

When Harold talks about freedom stops where someone else’s begins, this is what he means. You should let no one impose change on you. The same follows for you and others. You do not have a right to make someone do something they do not want to do. So lighten up. Let your family and friends breathe. People will surprise you. They change. But they change when they want to and at the pace they are comfortable with. Mind your own garden. You and they will be a lot happier.

Until next time…

Dave

 

 

 

Daily Ramblings – Thankful Thursday – Grateful for Siblings

Tags

Appreciative, Brother, close, family, Grateful, Sister, Thankful, tight

Today, I’m grateful for my brother and sister. My brother lives in Arizona, and my sister lives in Michigan, about 2 hours away. My brother is a Network Manager for Fender Guitars and my sister is a Program Manager for GM/Chrysler.

Both have a unique sense of humor, always attuned to the Gardner clan. I stay in touch with my brother via phone and playing coop video games together. He also likes to find funny memes and send them to me and my sister. My sister is closer. She visited this last weekend to hangout for Mother’s day and get out of the house and see something else for a change. When she comes over, we have long conversations into the wee hours.

I know some families that don’t get along so well. Not mine. My brother, sister, and I are like peas in a pod. Yeah, we have our own interests and my brother is a long way away, but all of us stay connected one way or another. I’m thankful for that.

It’s great to know you have two people, roughly the same age that have your back. It’s a comfort knowing that we will stick together through thick and thin. When I needed help, my brother and sister pitched in to help. When they need help, I hope I did the same. I always try to help out my family whenever I can. For me, it’s the only way to live.

Well, that’s it for today, folks. I hope you find something to be thankful for each day. It is a great practice. If you have a few minutes, start keeping a gratitude journal and write down three things you are grateful for everyday. It is a great practice and one that will keep your spirits up.

Until next time…

Dave

Daily Ramblings – Thankful Thursday – The Numbers are Going Down.

Tags

Coronavirus, family, Friends, Guidelines, health, Safety, Thankful, vulnerable

After watching today’s White House briefing, I was encouraged by Dr. Birx’s analysis of the models we have now, based on the numbers they are receiving from healthcare providers across the area. New York’s numbers are still high, but their cases are going down. Only time will tell.

That being said, I am thankful for the American people for sticking with the guidelines that have been provided. According to Dr. Birx, these lowered numbers (about 60,000, instead of the earlier numbers between 100,000 and 200,000 deaths). 60,000 deaths is still high, but it’s a much better number than the scary numbers that were put out a week ago.

I’m also thankful that all of my family in Michigan and Arizona is safe and healthy. I talked to a colleague of mine who is an ESL teacher in Vietnam. His grandmother died from the coronavirus, and his aunt is on a ventilator. Due to travel restrictions he can’t get home. Bad news indeed.

Finally, I am thankful for all the healthcare professionals, military, first responders, scientists, and other members of our critical supply chains continuing to go to work at great risk to themselves. I’m also grateful for the folks who work in our grocery stores, convenience stores, and restaurants (the ones that are still open for pickup or drive-thru). What a great collection of heros.

Please continue to stick with the guidelines that have been put in place. They are working. I realize being stuck at home is a pain, but if it saves the lives of those in our society that are most vulnerable, it’s worth it. I hope all of you continue to stay safe, stay informed, and follow guidance provided by our government.

Until next time…

Dave