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Tag Archives: Accepting Reality

Daily Ramblings – Motivation Monday

17 Monday Dec 2018

Posted by Dave Gardner in Motivation Monday

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Accepting Reality, Adapting to Reality, Calm, change, Complaining, Peace of Mind, Reacting to Reality, Viktor Frankl

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” – Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

I see so many people rail against reality. I see it in my friends, my family members from time-to-time, and even strangers who I come across in the gym or when I’m at the market. We all have problems to deal with. Some of these problems are self-inflicted, but a great deal of these problems is totally out of our control.

So, what do you do? Change yourself. This change isn’t about going against your values or your belief systems. It is about changing the way you react to something outside of you.

Here are some things that are outside of you that you will not change.

  • Weather
  • Governmental policies (other than voting and activism)
  • Traffic conditions
  • Your Genetic Makeup
  • What other people do

By no means is the above list all-inclusive. I provided this list to give you an idea of what I’m talking about in case you’ve never considered the premise of this article. Anything that is out of your control is exactly that—out of your control. Subsequently, any complaining you do about things that are out of your control create meaningless stress in your life and perpetuate the ridiculousness of attempting to change something you cannot.

Complaining or letting these outside, uncontrollable circumstances effect your mood is really a huge waste of time. How do you do this? It is really a decision about how you want to be on a daily basis. Do you want to be happy or do you want to be miserable? Do you want to feel betrayed all of the time or are you willing to give people the benefit of the doubt?

The more detached you are from outside circumstances and unrealistic expectations the calmer and more collected you will be. The next time you catch yourself complaining about the weather, seek out the benefits of that weather pattern. I, for example, love when it rains or snows. I think it is relaxing to watch the rain from my office window or wake up in the morning to a fresh blanket of snow on the trees in my front yard.

Just some food for thought.

Here’s my week:

  • I’m continuing my daily workout routine in the gym (I love my gym therapy!)
  • I’m continuing to work on the rough draft of my technical recruiting book
  • I’m continuing to work on my spiritual duties
  • I’m also re-reading Mini-habits, The 7 Habits, and Getting Things Done
  • I’m continuing my blogging, of course
  • I’m also in the process of setting new goals for the New Year (I’ll post my 2019 goals toward the end of this month)
  • Finally, I’m interacting on numerous social media platforms, getting to know new people, cultivating the relationships I have, and having fun

I hope all of you are excited about the holidays. This is truly my favorite time of the year.

Until the next time…

Dave

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Daily Ramblings – Spiritual Saturday

15 Saturday Dec 2018

Posted by Dave Gardner in Spiritual Saturday

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Accepting Reality, Complaining, Epictetus, Gratitude, Lessons, Patience, Stephen Covey

“It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” – Epictetus

Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/wisdom

Do you have trouble with complaining?

I used to, until I read a book by Stephen Covey, called “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”. In that book he discusses the fruitlessness of worrying or complaining about things that are out of our control. People complain about the weather, taxes, or any number of things that just happen and are out of their control.

There are lots of things we can do to mitigate challenges in our lives. We can take care of our health to avoid costly medical bills. We can manage our money, so we don’t miss payments and can plan for retirement. We can improve our skill set, so we are always viable in this fast-paced society.

Complaining about things that occur in our lives is really a waste of time. Things happen. One of my colleagues told me something a while back that was truly eye-opening. He said, “Remember, things happen for us, not to us.” What a great way to look at all the things that occur in our lives that just happen.

There are a few things I have come to believe in my life. First, everything is in its rightful place in the worlds of God. God is perfect. God doesn’t mess things up. There is a reason for everything. What is the reason? We are here to learn how to be better spiritually. Subsequently, what the human consciousness deems evil, bad, or unfortunate means nothing at the God-level.

Second, there is a lesson to be learned in every problem we face. If you agree with our purpose of existence—to learn, then each problem or situation we are placed in is an experience. These experiences are designed to teach us. They teach us what to do, what not to do, and how to be a more loving being. A being that knows how to give love and receive love.

Finally, everything happens for a reason. Many times, we don’t see the reason behind something that happens outside of us that affects our life. Maybe you needed to meet someone. Maybe you needed to go to a certain place. Maybe you needed an example of what not to do. The possibilities are endless and, in most cases, are a little bit outside our level of consciousness so that we “stretch” a little.

Sometimes we complain because we are helpless. We are unhappy with our current situation. Keep the above three things in mind when you begin singing the “woe is me” song. Instead, take a moment to be grateful for the situation you are in. There is a lesson to be learned. I have found when I take a moment to express gratitude for my life, regardless of my circumstances, life gets easier, lighter, happier.

I hope you enjoy your weekend! It’s great to be back from Phoenix and get back to work on the things I enjoy doing, particularly writing these daily postings for you, my readers. I hope each of you finds some wisdom in these words and they help you. That is the primary purpose of my blog. I’m not here to make money. I’m not here to be an affiliate for any company. I just want to spread the knowledge and wisdom I’ve gained throughout my life with the hope that perhaps my words will help someone else.

Until next time…

Dave

 

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