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Monthly Archives: February 2017

Daily Ramblings – The Physical Dimension

27 Monday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Four Dimensions of Life

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Exercise, fitness, gym, health, healthy living, nutrition, weight lifting

Covey’s Four Dimensions of Life

The next four postings to my blog will involve what Steven Covey (see https://www.stephencovey.com/). Each posting will discuss a specific dimension of life Dr. Covey talks about in his books. These four dimensions are the physical dimension, the social dimension, the mental dimension, and the spiritual dimension. We’ll start with the Physical Dimension.

The Physical Dimension

Your body is a gift. It is the physical manifestation that allows you to negotiate your life while you live it. A healthy body is built by a few things: 1) exercise, 2) eating right, 3) regular medical checkups, and 4) regular dental/optical checkups.

Exercise Apps and websites

Exercise should be composed of strength building exercises, cardiovascular exercises, and flexibility exercises. One of the best websites to visit, particularly if you are looking to achieve a particular health goal is www.bodybuilding.com. This website has all kinds of tools, supplements for sale, exercise routines, apps for your workouts that are android and iPhone friendly, and a collection of some of the best exercise and nutrition experts on the planet.

Eating right is another way to keep the body healthy. Eating right can best be achieved by doing what is called a meal prep. Meal prep is about choosing the foods that contribute to your health and building the meals you are going to eat for 2-3 days at a time. Your meals should stick with the three primary macros: Protein, healthy fats, and carbohydrates. You can find the appropriate way to measure out your macros on the www.bodybuilding.com website. Protein sources can be fish, poultry, pork, beef, shellfish, whey protein, eggs, and dairy products like cheeses. Your health fats would be olive oils, coconut oils, flax seed oil, avocado, etc. Carbohydrates should come from the complex carbohydrate groups like whole wheat, oats, barley, and brown rice. Complex carbohydrates will minimize spiking your blood sugar (which causes your body to store body fat), but give you the energy you need in the gym. You should always take multivitamins and other supplements. Again, your source should be www.bodybuilding.com or your doctor, if you have special circumstances to deal with.

Visiting the doctor for physical checkups, cancer screenings, and other needed monitoring should occur when your doctor recommends a visit. I usually get a full physical each year and checkups every 6 months, unless you are hurt or get the flu. Dental visits should include one deep cleaning per year and your eye doctor should see you at least annually to make sure your eyes are healthy and your prescriptions (if you wear glasses or contacts) are up to date.

The JYM Army

If you are already working out and looking for a real edge or challenge, you may also want to visit www.jimstoppani.com. The owner of this website is Dr. Jim Stoppani, who is also the creator of the JYM Army. The JYM Army is a group of like-minded bodybuilders who are striving to build muscle, lose weight, and remain on the cutting edge of exercise science. Dr. Stoppani is consistently publishing new articles, has his own supplement line, and creates exercise routines that will take you to the next level (trust me). Yeah, I’m plugging bodybuilding.com and Dr. Stoppani’s website, but I am not an affiliate collecting any money. I only want to point folks in the right direction if they are looking for some online resources that can really help you in your health journey.

Recommendations

First, visit with your doctor or health care provider. If you have never exercised before or pursued a consistent exercise regimen, I always advise you meet with your doctor to make sure an exercise routine will not hurt you. You may also want to inquire about your current medications and if there are any vitamins or supplements you should avoid.

Second, start small. There is a reason why the various gymnasiums out there push memberships at the later part of the year. They want to capitalize on the “New Year’s Resolution”. Memberships spike after Christmas and the gyms are a little more crowded in January and February. Take it from a guy that is in the gym 5-6 days a week. About the end of February, all of these folks stop coming and the gyms still collect their membership fees. To avoid all of this, start small. Start an exercise program in your home. You can find all kinds of apps for your iPhone or Android that you can download for free that are totally worth it to get in the habit of exercising. If you find these are still too intense, walk. That’s it, walk. Start with walking for about 15 minutes each day. Choose a time that works best, whether it’s in the morning before you go to work, take a walk for 15 minutes during your lunch break, or do your 15-minute walk at the end of the day. Regardless of the time, stay consistent. The time is irrelevant, but the pattern of doing your walk each day at this time is critical. It is much easier to establish an exercise habit if you stick to the same time of day and at the same place.

Third, do not over do it. I’ve been lifting weights for most of my life. I started lifting weights when I served in the Army and just kept up the habit when I left. I see this all the time in the gym. You see some guy or gal just crushing their work out and doing way more than they should be. In other words, what they are doing is just not scalable and not sustainable. Progression is important to see results, but initially, it is all about consistency. Build your routine gradually and limit your progression to small changes. For example, let’s say you choose to start walking for 15 minutes a day for 5 days a week. Once you feel comfortable with 15 minutes, move it up to 16 or 17 minutes. Stick with this for a month or at least 2 weeks. Then adjust again. The one thing you’ll find is that you’ll run out of time at some point. Once you’ve gotten yourself to 30 minutes or so, the next way to progress is to add in some strength exercises. One of the best apps out there for this type of thing is the 7-minute workout by Wahoo. You’ll find this in the iTunes library or Google Play. Regardless of which app you use, try it out to see if the workout is easy or too hard. Some of these apps are difficult and may be too much. When you find one that is your sweet spot, that’s the one to use. Again, consistency is the key.

Do your 7-minutes in the morning when you rise or when you get home at night. The key to this, particularly if you are working is to choose a time of day that you can get some hygiene in once you’re done. I lift during lunch, but I’m retired and have the time to get to the gym, knock out my workout and then shower in the gym or shower when I get home. When I was working, the time that worked best for me was in the evening on the way home from work.

Gym membership or not?

This is a personal decision and one that you’ll have to consider. These can be very expensive and if you are not motivated or utilizing the gym 3-4 days a week, I’m afraid this could be a huge waste of money. My membership costs 27 dollars per month. There are some gyms that charge much more. I’ve seen some that run 100 dollars per month. Frankly, I could care less about day care services or whether my gym has a juice bar. As long as my gym has the equipment I need and is large enough that I won’t be inconvenienced waiting for 10 minutes for a machine or bench, the gym is good for me. This is obviously a personal choice.

I would recommend getting a gym membership once you have truly established an exercise habit. I would say that if you are exercising for a consistent time period, let’s say 90 days and you are excited about your workouts every day, get the membership. You’ll be able to get a lot more done in a gym than you would in a home gym.

What to look for in a gym

I look for a large free weight area, a swimming pool, sauna, locker room with showers, a stretching area, and a cardio area. This may seem like a lot to ask, but there aren’t too many gyms that do not have this equipment and cater to their customers. I used to utilize LA Fitness when I lived in California and Arizona. Now that I’m home with the folks, I use a small gym in my hometown that has all of the above.

If you are in a metro area, run with LA Fitness or one of the larger franchise gymnasiums. They will have fitness classes (bike, yoga, Zumba, etc.). They will have a large selection of cardio equipment, exercise machines, and ample areas set up with free weights (benches, squat racks, smith machines, etc.). These are really important when you commence a bodybuilding routine. You may also want to engage a fitness trainer. The larger franchise gyms usually have 4 or more resident trainers that are always looking for new clients.

Even if weight training is something you are not interested in, the classes that are provided for free are worth the membership. Cycling classes, Zumba classes, Yoga, and others will provide you with enough variety that will keep you coming back. Another thing that is nice is the ability to network and make new friends in these classes. Your new-found friends will keep you coming back.

Well, I could go on and on with this stuff. I’ll tackle one of Covey’s four life dimensions in my next few postings. This one is one of the most important in my opinion. Without a healthy, strong, and fit body, your quality of life can be absolutely horrendous.

If any of you are brave enough to visit Jim Stoppani’s website. Tell me which exercise routine you are interested in (he has hundreds of them). I’m working through Jim’s Daily Grind currently. I’ll see you there. Go JYM Army!!

Until next time…

Daily Ramblings – Turning Points

23 Thursday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in change

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

change, decisions, fate, future, improvement, Life, new

My life has been one, long, on-going adventure. It started in the early 80s when I enlisted in the US Army and began a 20-year career. What I’ve discovered over the years, particularly when I reflect on my life, is that there are turning points. These turning points are those actions that cause a move from one place, one person, or one attitude for another. This change, in my experience, has always been better for myself and those around me at the time.

Once such turning point came in August of 2003. One morning, I awoke and complained to my wife at the time that it felt like I had dislocated my hip. She got up and immediately called a doctor and I was set up for a meeting on a Monday morning. When I went to the doctor, he mentioned that I had been in for numerous visits concerning my lower back. In light of this, he recommended that I get an MRI and have it analyzed by a neurologist.

A few weeks later I got the results. They felt it was a herniated disc. The doctor upon receiving the results felt it might be a little more and sent me on my way to a neurosurgeon, who, in his opinion, would have a better idea of what might be going on. I met with this neurosurgeon about a week or so after that.

When I met with the neurosurgeon, I was surprised by the small office. I figured a neurosurgeon had to make a lot of money and would have all kinds of staff running around, a large office with all kinds of books, and a large desk with all of his degrees on the wall behind him. This wasn’t the case. To my surprise, his office was small, because he was never in it. He was one of many doctors in this office complex who split their time between this small little office and an operating room in the nearby hospital.

When I settled into my chair, the doc showed me a model of a human spine. He showed me what discs were affected and what he proposed to do, to alleviate me from the pain I had been experiencing for over a month. He also had me take a look at the pictures of my MRI, showing me what a normal disc looked like, compared to the distorted pictures of my discs in the MRI pictures. Obviously, I agreed to surgery. I was in a lot of pain, and my discs, the two largest discs in my back, were ruptured, with fragments of them drifting about. The doc told me the key problem is the lower disc, which has been rubbing on the nerve bundle that runs down the left leg, called the Sciatic nerve.

After my surgery, the pain was gone, but I had lost some feeling in my left leg. This was caused by the nerve damage the disc had done to that nerve bundle. It rubbed a hole in this bundle of nerves and did damage to them that would take a long time to heal. In light of this surgery and the result, my Army career was over. I opted to retire and put in my retirement paperwork when I hit my 20 years in October of 2004.

This turn of events also motivated me to go to school to get a degree before I retired. I was laid up for some time and had plenty of time on my hands. I earned a Bachelor’s degree and Master’s degree before I left the Army and got a great job with a prestigious firm in Los Angeles. Because of this move, so many things have unfolded.

This turn of events motivated me to get a degree, motivated me to retire, and motivated me to work in a field that was highly lucrative, which is why today at the young age of 53 I was able to retire and truly pursue what I love—writing. There are many more of these turning points throughout the last 12 years since my Army retirement. Interestingly, when the decision was made to leave the Army and go to work in the civilian sector, a calmness overtook my life, like a recognition that I had done the right thing. Have you ever experienced a turning point like this? A point which resulted in a major change in your life where the situation you found yourself was monumentally better than the situation you were in previously? If so, comment here. I’d love to hear your story.

Until next time…

Daily Ramblings – Striving

20 Monday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in self-improvement

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Exercise, Improving, Learning, Meditation, Reading, self-improvement, Striving, Studying, Writing

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” George Eliot

Wow, what a great quote right? How many stories have been told through the ages of a life wasted? Wow, he or she could have been this, if only….?

When you wake up in the morning, do you realize that you are the best you’ve ever been, ever? It only gets better moving forward. I realize this may sound to be a little over the top from a positivity perspective, but why can’t it be like that? It can be.

One of the things I’ve discovered since beginning this blog and following others is that there are a lot of folks who are striving. Striving to improve. Striving to be better. Striving to heal. Striving to be heard. I really enjoy reading the thoughts of others and try to put myself in their position, really feeling where they are in life. But, living a life well-lived is about the striving, right? I think it is.

I am striving for many things. I want to become a writer. I want to tweak my prose so people will be drawn to my books, my blog, or whatever I create for a reader to consume. I want to be in the best shape of my life so my brain and body will serve me as long as humanly possible. I strive toward this goal with daily exercise, eating right, a daily dose of reading, learning, writing, and meditation. I want to be loved, so I strive to interact with people, cultivate new relationships by putting myself out there, and maintaining the relationships I have with my family and my friends by staying in touch and doing those little things that make my loved ones know they are my world and they can depend on me.

I strive for a great many things that pertain to my physical well-being, my financial well-being, my mental and intellectual well-being, my spiritual well-being, and my social well-being. This striving is what keeps me alive. I continuously look for ways to improve and get better, all while taking care of the most important person in my life—me. If I am not striving for that next goal, that next hilltop, that next landmark, then I am moving backward.

Don’t get me wrong. We all get sick. We all get old. We all get blind-sided by those things that we didn’t see coming, which put us into a temporary tailspin. What I’m talking about here is purposeful striving, continuing forward, regardless of what we get hit with or encounter.

This is where the quote above really hit me. I don’t want to be that person that looks back over their life regretting that I didn’t do something I could have done. I don’t want to be that person that cowered in fear and avoided something because it might be too hard or too scary to even try. I want to look back on my life and say, I did the very best I could with what I had and from where I started. Man, what a great ride this life has been.

We all come to this world with our own baggage and circumstances. Some are outright advantageous, while others are the exact opposite. If you are ever discouraged, look around the web for a bit or go to your local library. You’ll find a story about a person who had it rougher than you and excelled. You’ll also find a person who had everything and wasted their opportunity. A well-lived life is not all about the accolades and accomplishments. It is about the striving.

By the way, I chose the Ballerina picture, as a way of demonstrating striving in action (they work really hard to get good at this particular kind of dance).

Until next time…

 

 

Daily Ramblings – Visualization

17 Friday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Visualization

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Tags

creation, creativity, inner vision, Meditation, Visualization

“Be great in act, as you have been in thought.” – Jean Paul

In this posting, I want to discuss visualization. Visualization is a really handy tool to solve problems, create something new, or simply to contemplate new ideas. I realize that many people cannot visualize. Hopefully the steps I provide below will help you build your ability to visualize. Once you know how to make visualization a part of your life there are all kinds of benefits you can use to improve it.

We all possess the ability to visualize what we want. When we create something, we always visualize it in our minds first, even if it is a subconscious process. Steven Covey (author of the 7 habits) discusses this as the first and second creations. At first, we “see” in our minds what we need and how it is put together. Then we build from our visualized blueprint. This occurs whether we are creating a plan of action, writing a blog post or book, giving a speech, or building a machine, a home, or a piece of art.

Visualization is not hard, but if you have never consciously done it, it can be a little daunting. Like any skill, it takes practice to build from where you are currently. Here are a few ways for you to improve your ability to visualize.

Steps to build visualization into your life:

  • Step 1: Imagine you are sitting in the sand on a beach. As you sit there, visualize the blue-green water and your feet in the white sand. The picture is the first step in visualizing. Keep the picture simple. Only visualize your feet in the sand and the picture of the ocean in front of you.
  • Step 2: Add sound. Now hear the ocean surf washing up on the shore 20 feet in front of where you are sitting. Only add the visual and the sound.
  • Step 3: Add feeling. How does the sand feel? How does the breeze feel coming off of the ocean? How does the sun feel beaming down on you? Only add the visual, sound, and feeling.
  • Step 4: Add taste. Visualize drinking from a water bottle. Feel the condensation and temperature of the bottle. Feel the gritty sand under your feet. Feel the sun on your legs. Taste the crisp water coming out of your water bottle. Only add the visual, sound, feeling, and taste.
  • Step 5: Add more complexity. Add Seagulls to your picture. Add a porpoise diving out of the water. Add a person (man or female) running down the beach in the distance with their dog.
  • Step 6: Ad infinitum. Add whatever you wish to your visualization. When you come back to the present, write down any notes on your experience when you’re completed. Typically I try to visualize things daily for about 5-10 minutes as part of my meditation practice. Revisit this place when you are stressed out or just want a respite from the day.

This is a simple exercise that you can practice every day. Once you’ve mastered this scene. You can make your own scenes and practice on adding complexity to them. The really interesting part of this exercise is when you begin adding complexity unconsciously and your creation takes off on its own (this takes a lot of practice).

Here are some prompts for other visualizations you can do:

Visualize a trip you would like to take. What sounds do you hear? What do you feel internally and externally? What unique smells do you encounter? (If you are having difficulty, go online and search for images of the place you want to go. This helps a lot when you are first starting out)

Visualize your body in good shape. What do you look like? How does your body feel?

Visualize a place you can go to relax and reduce stress? What does your safe place look like? Is it a garden? Is it a monastery to meditate in? Is it a mountain top allowing you to hear the wind and take in a breath-taking panorama?

As you can see, your creativity will allow you to go anywhere and do anything. It’s how we take the basics of visualization to create what we want and really experience it. You have unlimited freedom in your inner worlds and all of it will be uniquely tailored to you. I hope you have a good time doing this and enjoy yourself.

If you try these techniques and something works for you, reply to this posting. I’d love to hear about your inner adventures.

Until next time…

Daily Ramblings – “Do Whatever” Days

11 Saturday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Uncategorized

≈ 6 Comments

“Think what a better world it would be if we all, the whole world, had cookies and milk about three o’clock every afternoon and then lay down on our blankets for a nap.” – Barbara Jordan

Today is Saturday and I love it. Out of the 7-day week, Saturday is my day to do whatever. I sleep in. I get a lot of reading done. I listen to a few good pieces of music while I lounge around and read my latest book. I think it is a good move to have a “do whatever” day. It gives us the freedom to really do what we want, when we want, or do nothing at all. There is a caveat to this “do whatever day”, however. Mine is my habits, which I am trying to build. These I do not miss.

For me, my current habits daily are writing, reading, working out, flossing, and meditating. With all of the advice of minimizing, some may say this list is a little big. Well, I guess it is, but some of these I’ve pretty much mastered and about ready to pull from my daily reminder list. I use an app called Habit Bull for my reminders. It is literally nothing more than a list of my habits that I click on when I’ve completed a task. I typically run them for 99 days. I know the research out there says 66, but 99 is my way of really making sure that the neuropathways in my brain are solidified before adding another habit.

I also start very small with my habits. When I started the writing habit, I stuck with about 300 words a day. When I started my reading habit, it was just one article online or a page in a book. When I began my workout routine a long time ago it was 10 minutes on an exercise bike.

Starting small is really crucial to the habit-building process. I start ridiculously small. Write a sentence. Read a paragraph or page, or doing one pushup is what I’m talking about. This may seem silly, but your brain doesn’t know the difference. All it knows is that you are doing something new. Once you’ve done this for a few weeks, the brain begins to “expect” to do this thing you do every day now. When this expectation occurs is dependent upon the individual. I tend to feel a shift in the habit’s solidity when I start feeling a need to do something. It’s almost like I become addicted to doing this one thing.

There are many folks who want to get rid of bad habits. You can apply the same process. Let’s say you want to minimize your caffeine or sugar intake. First, you have to know what level of consumption you are at. Once you do this, take a little bit away.

Let’s say you have 6 cups of coffee a day. Some may think this is a large amount, others may say, that doesn’t even dent my level of coffee consumption. Instead of having that 6 cups a day, chop it away to 5 or 5 ½ cups a day. Do this for a week. Write this one thing down on a pad, a journal, or some app reminder you use. Right before going to bed, check it off your list. Once you do this for a week, chop it down again to 4 or 4 ½ cups per day. Keep doing this until you have your coffee consumption down to where you want it. Believe it or not, I used to be a 10+ cup a day person. I’m down to two. My initial plan was never to quit coffee altogether, but to lower my consumption. Once I hit my goal of two (one in the morning and another mid-morning), I pulled this from my habit creation list and moved on to the next.

You can do this with anything you wish, but I would start with those really heartfelt goals you have for yourself. Start with the really impactful habits. Here’s a list you can start with:

Negative habits you want to remove:

  • Lower nicotine intake to one cigarette a day
  • Lower coffee consumption to one or two cups a day
  • Lower your sugar intake to two cheat meals a week

Positive habits you want to add:

  • Read a page a day
  • Write a sentence a day
  • Do one pushup a day
  • Drink one glass of water a day
  • Meditate for 5 minutes each day
  • Plan or brainstorm for 5 minutes each day

Obviously, this list is not all-inclusive. Our habits are a very personal thing. Whether we want to remove things we don’t like or add things we are not doing is a personal choice. My advice would be to pick just one thing that would have an immediate and long-lasting impact on your life. My first habit ever was working out.

There’s another thing about habit building. Once you grow one habit, you’ll decide later that you want to improve that habit even more. Then you add that new habit to your list and continue to pursue others, which is why my list has 5 on it, instead of only one or two. My workout habit is pretty well established, along with my reading habit. My writing, meditation, and flossing habits are still in the infantile stages and ones that I am really focusing on to solidify.

If you want more advice on this habit-building regimen, you’ll want to take a look at a book called Mini Habits by Steven Guise. This is a great book and one that will explain why this mini habit process is founded in many psychological principles.

Some habits are beneficial, while others are really horrible for you. Think about the person you would like to become and utilize the steps listed in this book or here. It is really this simple. Here are some apps that can help you as well:

HabitBull (compatible for Android and iPhone) – simple habit-building

ToDoist (compatible for Android, iPhone, and The Web) – simple routine-building to-do list

Once you have established some good habits, you can begin building what has been called a routine or ritual. These are the things you do every day without fail in the morning and evening. The morning routine could be as simple as get up, make the bed, meditate, eat breakfast, brush teeth. Your evening routine could be as simple as take a shower, brush teeth, get out clothes for tomorrow, listen to calming music, read, and retire.

Routines solidify your habits into a regimen of activities, triggering one event after another. You can see my habit of brushing teeth (and flossing) in both routines. When I was working full time, I had a mid-day routine, which also included reading, eating lunch, and brushing teeth. Routines become a macro habit once you have done it for a while. The key again is to start simple. Yours maybe get up at this time, make the bed, eat breakfast, brush teeth, head to work. Whatever you decide for your daily rituals is up to you, but another great way to automate your day by building habits of activity structures that you automatically do every day without fail, using one habit to trigger another.

Well, I’m off to the enjoy the rest of my “do whatever day”. I hope you enjoy the picture of the cookies featured in this posting. They are my Mom’s Gluten-free chocolate chip cookies.

Until next time…

Daily Ramblings – Criticism

09 Thursday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Quotes

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Criticism, Disapproval, Disapproval Matrix, habit, habits

“To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.” – Elbert Hubbard

When was the last time you avoided doing something because of the potential criticism you might hear? Criticism can come from many directions. The criticism can come from your parents, your friends, your colleagues at work, or your customers. The quote above, provided by Elbert Hubbard, addresses this. Criticism is a necessary good and evil in life. It is good when it comes from a source that truly cares about what you do or cares about you as a person. The people that want you to do better will typically criticize the quality of your work. It might sound like this: “Hey, your first book was wonderful; this third one is a little disappointing.”

If you are being criticized by someone who cares about you, it may sound like this: “Hey, your first book was wonderful, you did such a great job describing this and that; the third one was disappointing, is everything ok with you?” The nuance between both statements is there, but one is truly depicting a person who is criticizing your work and cares about your product offering; while the other is depicting a person, who is criticizing your work, but cares about how you are doing and how that may have impacted your performance.

When I was searching the web for various articles, topics, and definitions of criticism, I ran across a diagram called the disapproval matrix. The author of this matrix is Ann Friedman (www.annfriedman.com). She breaks down criticism by people into 4 groups. The rational critics I described above are the Lovers and the critics. Both groups care about your work and you. The irrational group is at the bottom of the matrix. These groups are labeled the Frenemies and Haters. Obviously, we’ve all ran across the haters. These are the trolls out there whose miserable existence consists of nothing but tearing down others without any other reason than to get a rise out of someone. The Frenemies are those that undermine you and hope you fail, but criticize through a false veil of concern dripping in sarcasm. Interestingly, Ann also lists “yourself” as one of the frenemies in the irrational list.

This threw me for a loop, but after some contemplation really hit home and drove me right back to my original question: When was the last time you avoided doing something because of the potential criticism you might hear? Think about the excuses you tell yourself when it’s too cold out to take your daily run or when one donut, one cigarette, or one drink won’t hurt (I’ve earned it you say). Maybe you’re trying to establish a writing habit and before you know it that one game of “Candy Crush” turns into a 4-hour marathon, where everyone and their brother keeps sending you lives.

One of the keys to getting things done, achieving your goals, and establishing good or eliminating bad habits is affected by that one Frenemy you can’t run from—that internal you who never stops telling you that you can’t do this or that because you’re not good enough, other people have already done that, there’s no market for that, and the list goes on.

When you are trying to do something with your life, listen to the critics who really matter. These critics are the lovers and critics who care about you and your product. You can leave the rest in your dust without looking back, including that internal critic you can’t escape from. When that internal critic starts talking, turn up the music, look at something positive or motivating, meditate, or whatever you do to quiet that negative internal voice. You can do this. I know you can.

Until next time…

Stretching the Mind…

07 Tuesday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Quotes, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

answers, consciousness, Emotions, ideas, Intellect, memory, questions, subconscious

“A mind stretched by new experiences can never go back to its old dimensions.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.

The mind is a collection of neural pathways forged by our senses, thoughts, and our experiences. The mind collects. The mind compares. The mind stores.

Each of us is unique because our senses and the neural pathways they create are forged by our circumstances. But is the mind all there is?

A mind is a tool. We exist beyond the mind but need the mind to negotiate the reality of this reality. We are our consciousness.

Think about emotions, memories, intellect, and subconscious. These collectively represent the mind, the combination of which are infinite when we deal with the world. When a particular experience is over you will come away from a collective experience with your own unique version of it. You interpret the event with your emotions, any memories that may provide some background, you evaluate the input with your intellect, and there may even be something in your subconscious that contributes to your experience. If you talk to others who experienced the event, there will be differences in each person’s unique way of interpreting the event.

Our consciousness allows us to be aware of things and to accept or reject them. Our consciousness is what allows us to think of things beyond what the mind has seen or collected. Our consciousness allows us to find new ways of doing things. How does this occur?

Consciousness is connected to a greater expanse. Some call this expanse God. Others call it the Universe. The name that is given to it is irrelevant. We can contact this expanse and find what already exists somewhere in infinity.

By doing so, we stretch. We become more aware each time we tap into this greater consciousness. The next time you have a problem to solve. Ask the question. Write your question down. Think about it before you go to sleep. The answer will come in some way. It could come while listening to a radio program, watching television, or surfing the Internet. You could see your answer on a billboard, in a book, or overhear someone in the coffee shop you frequent. The more aware you are, the easier it will be to find the answer to your question. The only caveat to this is to test the answer you receive. Ask for a confirmation. Sometimes the mind gets in the way. It doesn’t believe the answer it receives and will block some of it out. We will misinterpret the response we get to our question. The answer comes. They always come. What is important is becoming aware enough to receive them.

Until next time…

Pay Attention to the Gaps…

05 Sunday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Quotes

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Buddhism, Meditation, mindfullness, Response, Stimulus, Zen

Image Credit – Calm

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” Viktor E. Frankl (credit Brainy Quotes)

I enjoy a meditation practice daily. What is interesting about this quote is the space Viktor Frankl discusses in this quote. There is a space in meditation practice as well, called the gap. The gap is at the end of an inhale and the end of an exhale. If you focus on the gap, there is an awe-inspiring silence and spaciousness that you begin to tap into.

When you ponder this gap, you begin to recognize that there are gaps everywhere. Listen to a wind-up clock or cooking timer. Do you hear the gaps between the ticks and the tocks? Listen to music. Do you hear the gaps? Listen to the ocean, do you hear the gaps between the incoming and outgoing of the waves?

There is a rhythm to our universe, a rhythm to this reality, filled with activity and inactivity, sounds and silence. There are gaps between each beat of your heart. There are gaps to our vision when we blink.

The space between a stimulus and response. We see something we respond. We hear something we respond. We taste something we respond. We read something we respond.

Being mindful, like the practitioners of Zen means to pay very close attention to the gaps. Think about all of the things that get a rise out of you. Why do you react the way you do? What causes you to be angry, fearful, jealous, happy, sad, excited, horny? Take a moment to analyze these triggers in your life. There is always a gap before you respond.

When we allow our paradigms or autopilot to react to these things unconsciously we are not living. We have become a machine. We see an ad and we rush out and buy something. We see a commercial with food and we go get something to eat. We get angry and we have a tantrum. We get fearful and we use whatever our autopilot dictates.

If you want to change something that brings pain or sorrow or fear or any other type of feeling that does not benefit you, you can change it. Watch for the triggers, pay attention to the space between the stimulus to this trigger and how you react to it. By observing the stimulus, identifying your trigger, you can pause, wait, and make a conscious choice versus an unconscious one. When you master this process, you begin to master yourself.

Until the next time…

Black History Month

04 Saturday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

This is Black History Month in the United States. As of 1976, every U.S. President has officially designated the month of February as Black History Month. Canada and the UK also celebrate their own Black History Months. One of the most prominent figures of American history is Frederick Douglass.

Frederick Douglass, born Frederick Augustus Washington Bailey, was a slave until he escaped his bondage at the age of twenty and grew up to become a propagandist of the Union cause and emancipation, a recruiter of black troops, and advisor to President Abraham Lincoln (www.history.com).

“The soul that is within me no man can degrade”, is one of Mr. Douglass’ quotes and is so important when considering the plight of his people. In a world where the Soul is possessed (e.g. my soul) this consideration of Soul as the true self provides one with a sense of freedom, regardless of the circumstances a person is experiencing. If Soul is residing in the physical body and considered the true self, it follows then that the physical body is merely a shell possessed by the Soul and not the other way around.

This point of view provides a freedom that is external to the physical senses and one I find interesting. If we are Soul and not the body Soul is occupying, it allows us to realize that though the physical body may be imprisoned, Soul is free. Free to go where it will and not subject to the abject horrors that slavery has wrought on so many throughout human history. There are many religious world-views that espouse Soul as the true self.

Frederick Douglass was an example and inspiration to all Americans. He rose from being a slave to become an advisor to the President of the United States on two separate occasions, demonstrating that the spirit is stronger than a person’s physical body or the terrible conditions one is born into. Each of us has the same ability if we use it. I challenge each of my readers to read stories about individuals like Frederick Douglass who overcame prejudice, fear, and great hardship to land a place in history, anytime you feel like life has dealt you a bad hand.

Frederick Douglass was one of our great American heroes. I applaud him and the many other African Americans that have blessed our American history.

References

History.com (n.d.). Frederick Douglass. Retrieved on February 4, 2017, from http://www.history.com/topics/black-history/frederick-douglass

Credit for Frederick Douglass’ image goes to bio.com

Until next time…

Overwhelming…

03 Friday Feb 2017

Posted by Dave Gardner in Productivity

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

facebook, Google+, LinkedIn, Productivity, reality, social media, time-management, twitter, virtual

via Daily Prompt: Overwhelming

I enjoy these daily prompts, particularly on those days when I either have too many ideas or too few ideas about what I would like to write about. I write every day and will either post here, or work on one of the many book ideas I have. My primary project will deal with technical recruiting and provides me a way to give back to the profession that gave so much to me. The word overwhelming could be applied to so many things today. Social media is overwhelming, particularly if you are a member of more than one of these sites. I enjoy Twitter, LinkedIn, Google+, and Facebook. When these media sites are at their peak during the day, it is amazing how many things are being discussed, posted, and reposted.

Like email, I limit myself to a few visits to these sites each day, this blog included. On days that I am absolutely bored and unmotivated, I’ll gravitate from one board to another, clicking like, retweet, etc. During these days the time flies because we become so mesmerized by the blur of activity, funny videos, pictures of our friends, and so on.

As a way to provide some value to my readers, I’ll get to my point. Social media is “virtual” life. It is not real. Sure it’s fun to have someone give you a like for a posting, just like it is a real treat to get likes on my postings here, but frankly, the people you consider your friends in these mediums barely scratch the surface of what true friendship and family are.

These sites are fun. They are interesting and allow us to connect with people that in the past we would have had no access to. I treat the people in my networks as pen pals. Pen pals were something I learned about in elementary school. Our teacher got us to sign up and we each had a friend from another country that we would write to and so forth. After a few years I lost track of my pen pal, but today I have thousands of them.

I’m in America and have friends in Indonesia, the Phillippines, the UK, Germany, the Netherlands, India, and many other places. It is so interesting to see what other people find funny, sad, or even how they celebrate. You can see it all on social media. Now, it may not be an exact representation of what you would consider traditional, but it is so heartwarming to see a friend put up pictures of a newborn, or pictures of a far-away place they’ve visited.

Spend time with your family. Spend real time with your family away from the social media, the mobile phones, and really listen to them. Control the amount of time you spend on these sites. They will suck the life out of you and minimize your ability to do anything creatively, pursue your dreams, or accomplish your goals.

I treat them just like I do email. I review my email 4 times a day. I visit my email mid-morning after my morning ritual, I visit again after lunch, evening after dinner, and during my evening ritual. When I’m going through my email I’ll also check my sites, sometimes only for a few seconds if no one has responded to my postings, I have no new friend invites, and so on.

Social media is here to stay. It is fun, it is interesting, and it is definitely entertaining. It is not a substitute for life or real relationships with your friends, family, and loved ones. Now go hug your wife, your kids, your mother and father. That is where our time needs to be placed.

Until next time…

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